Tales of Northern travels

I am currently sitting in the body of a hotel in Delhi and the last 84 hours have been fun and exciting.

Thursday morning I woke at 03:45 from the call from the taxi driver. A fundamental problem in India is that there are no road signs and many roads do not have names. Therefore explaining to taxi driver where I live is a challenge everytime. Also taxi drivers, unlike everyone else, insist on coming early in India. I manage to explain where I stay but he cannot come all the way to the apartment as the road has just been freshly cemented. Anywho, I get ready and walk down to the taxi and say I need to fetch something from the flat. He has gotten some courage and just drives through the freshly-poured cement: bad ass. So all products loaded and were off to pick up colleague on the way to the airport.

Now colleague was not early so I relaxed at a local café in a predominantly Muslim area in the early hours of the morning. It is interesting to observe how the bustle starts early in Hyderabad. By 5 am there are already plenty of people moving about getting ready for the day. Flight to Delhi is easy but a long and interesting work day. Having the right connections meant we were introduced to all manner of high ranking people in a large Indian corporation, so that bodes wells for business. Evening is spent collecting colleague and relaxing with a beer in hotel.

Next morning we are up by 05:30 as we are flying off to Shimla. Now Shimla used to be the summer capital of India. Meaning that the heat in Delhi was so intense that 4 months out of the year the government shifted to the mountain village, which is located 2200 metres above sea level. We fly in a small propeller plane and land on India's shortest commercial runway (1240 m). The airport is literally placed on top of a flattened mountain, so there is no possibility for expansion! A very cosy airport and I walk out to photograph the plane and start chatting to the local fireman. Now this guy has a great job. There is one flight a day to Shimla and after the plane flies back the airport closes for the day. After a relaxing wait and confirming that the plane can take off we are collected and start the 20 km journey to Shimla along beautifully winding mountain roads. As we come into Shimla one can sense that this is a city of 30,000 that has swelled to close to 300,000. The city clings to a mountain side and is very crowded but still somehow very cosy. The views are amazing and the centre of town is closed to automotive traffic, so people walk everywhere. All the official buildings hail from the British era for good or bad but it does give a distinct feeling of nostalgia. We enjoy a walk through town and the lovely 25 degree weather, a lovely contrast to the 43 degrees of Delhi of Hyderabad. We walk by Scandal point, where an Indian price grabbed a British woman, threw her on his horse, rode away and had a few days of fun with her and let her go. Very interesting and I was encouraged to carry out a reverse reenactment by a colleague…There were horses available for rent but I decided to give it a miss.

The journey by car to Delhi was long. Just to drive 120 km to Chandigarh took over 3 hours and this is with a driving style not even matched by certain members of the Sixt klargørings staff. Our driver was an Indian boy-racer who on a number of occasions was very close to having my foot up his ass from sheer annoyance. Due to lack of sleep I was not able to hide this fact and some nasty words may have been said. In Chandigarh we changed cars and driver. I am not sure if my aggressions had played a part but the new driver didn't use his horn once so maybe someone gave him a heads up about the Danish psycho, that or he realized that all his passengers wanted to sleep. The car was a brand new Mahindra Xylo, which is perfectly suited for the Indian roads and meant that the read passengers were sound asleep. However someone had decided to remove the front headrests meaning that where I dosed off my head road bop back and I would wake very abruptly. Now matter, it was still the best driving experience in India. Go Mahindra.

After a 3 a.m. arrival in Delhi and a great sleep my colleague and I decided to spend the day sightseeing. We asked the hotel for a driver who could speak some English. Needless to say we ended up with the only Indian I've meet who spoke absolutely NO English at all. However he was a great and kind man who took us where we wanted to go although a request for a shoeshop lead us to a 20 km detour but let's leave that be.

At the India gate I got a picture of a snake charmer with a REAL cobra. He beckoned me to take a picture and then right after threw the lid on the basket, scooped it up and into his pack and came over and demanded Rs. 500. I am proud that I argued with a man with a poisonous snake (probably with fangs removed) and gave him Rs. 10! After this we went to the Akshardham Temple (cultural centre apparently). Newly made but very impressive centre built to honour some Yogi or something (as you can see I am really getting the Indian culture). It was a lovely place and my fears of a spiritual centre not having a food court were quickly banished and I got some water and thoroughly enjoyed myself. After this we went to the Lotus temple which really is a stunning building and worth seeing. I could imagine it'd be beautiful at night but time did not allow.

The day ended with dinner and return to the hotel. I relaxed in my room watching a movie and surfing the net. I felt fortunate sharing the day with my colleague and sharing in the oddness of Indian handholding amongst men. Interesting being in a place where the only PDA is amongst dudes. Today I saw two guys rolling on the grass together! It is just so interesting that couples sit and talk but barely touch whereas the male masses are behaving in a way that would result in arrest in most southern states.

Today I have been living a true white man in India fantasy: I watched tv in bed til 11 and then got a A/C'd car to the Le Meridien. Now from the outside this place looks pretty worn down, something akin to an old Scandic hotel in DK. Now when you walk in it's a whole different world. Ultra modern with Moroso chairs and white marble. I meet with my former colleague for Brunch. We enjoy a couple of beers as I feast on jumbo shrimp, chicken and mutton kebabs, fresh soup. We share our stories and tales of India and have a wonderful time catching up. After he leaves I turn to the desert table and order champagne (yes, it's included in the price) and indulge in various cakes and parfaits and I read the paper and finish off with an espresso. I retire to the lobby to enjoy the soft rustling of water as I read the paper. Hereafter I decide to walk down to the India gate.

On the way to the India gate I am approached by two auto drivers who almost start a fight about my business and I convince them that I merely want to walk off my HUGE brunch. I walk on a little and one driver follows me down the road and tries to convince me that even if I just want to walk walk away from the road so drivers don't stop and don't go with the other driver. I walk on a see two men frolicking on the lawn and continue to walk down where I meet the other auto driver. We offers to drive me around for an hour and show me the India gate and parliament. Decide that for 50 Rupees that sounds fine and we set off. He hears I am from Denmark and says "Goddag" as his sister has lived in Valby. Right. He also takes me to the Danish Embassy and I take photos and enjoy the conversation. The other driver was supposedly his enemy and I believe the quote of the day was "If you tell him to fuck off then I'll only charge you 40!" He says this laughing and smiling. The man is a tall Sikh with a big beard and blue turban. He supposedly lives by my hotel and offers to drive me home for free as he is going that way anyways. I agree and off we roll to the textile shop. Now I have already gotten a lecture on Pashiman quality by now and I am thinking that if the prices seem reasonable then why not. So we go in the shop and get a cup of tea and I am enjoying the chat and the people are super nice and of course I end up buying 2 pashinas and 5 silk paintings and I will never know if I got ripped off or if it all was a elaborate setup (most likely) but I must admit I had a wonderful time and bought things that I think are really beautiful so in the end that is most important. I loved by drivers agreed code for BUY "If I say 'good' it means buy, if I say 'very good' it means don't buy"!

Now I return to my hotel (I am now writing 2 days later in Hyderabad) and blog and wait for the driver to come and he arrives 15 min late but this is no biggie as I am in good time. We start moving and we are both slightly curious as to why the A/C isn't working but on we roll and soon I notice that the engine temp is way into the red. So I ask the driver to pull over and pop the hood and I check the oil and there is no issue…hmmm. Flight leaves in 90 min and it's 20 min to the airport. So driver says that his mate will bring his other car and it's no problem. So we wait a bit and then we decide to pop down to the mechanic to check out the car.

So we pull into a dark and dingy alley and turn into another slightly more well-lit but equally dingy alley and stop in front of a group of gentlemen jumping around and bagging on various parts of a minivan. We pop the hood and within 2 min the diagnoses is made: fan isn't running due to blown fuse. Driver goes off to buy fuse, clock is ticking. Driver comes back and fuse is installed, car is running great and the info comes that the other case has also broken down so my hopes are on this little Maruti Suzuki being healthy. 60 min till departure.

I think we're ready to go but we just need a little water in the cooler to make sure that shit doesn't get hairy on the wait to the airport. Water found, poured in, man paid, good to go. Now under any other circumstances this would have been a super fast service visit but I am starting to get nervous. My flight is the last one today for Hyderabad but I also just loving the experience. "Don't worry, I'll take all the VIP shortcuts"…awesome. 50 min till departure. Now we go through back alleys and small roads and then follow in close pursue of car can in front. So close in fact that when it breaks we read end him…45 min til departure. No harm no foul, smiles all around and we are under way yet again. Driver is talking about the grace of god and that I'll make it because god loves me. I am a little skeptical and say my faith will be renewed when I am sitting on that plane. Now during this journey I am for the first time feeling that an Indian taxi driver is going to slow but amazingly we arrive 30 min before departure. I am in such a state I forget to pay the guy and run off. I check in: 2 min, pass security: 5 min and then go down to the gate and have time for a bathroom visit before I board the plane! Sometimes things just work out exactly how they should. J

India vs. Malaysia

I have just come back from a 9 day trip to Kuala Lumpur and man are there some differences between the two places. What is interesting to note and think about is if India will be like Malaysia in 20-40 years?

Malaysia is green green green everywhere. Where the soil hasn't been covered with concrete there is something growing. Now this is a result of the tropical climate and the fact that it generally rains once a day. This is unlikely to happen in Hyderabad, so I will not be expecting this.

Malaysia has freeways everywhere. 2-3 lanes in each directly and constantly packed with traffic. I got stock in the rush out of KL on Friday and spent 4 hours travelling 20 km. India is building up its road net at the moment but then again the new road from Hyderabad airport is bumpy and unlevel and has only been open a year. Whether this is due to bad consultants, contractors or low budgets I am not sure, but the fact remains that even such new projects are not up to the standards in countries like Malaysia or Europe.

The above is something I started a few days ago and the answer is that India will only develop like other countries through a change in mindset. The will will for solidarity needs to be widespread and then it'll happen. Otherwise the right people will just continue to wall themselves in (literally) and leave the outside to decay.

Now I would like to share with you tales of my travels to the state of Kerala and Tamil Nadu. The trip starts with a morning cab trip to the airport. A quick affair but along the road that is already bumpy so soon after being opened. I arrive in good time, check in, eat a little breakfast whilst reviewing some work material. I believe that airport lounges are universally expensive but then again I must admit that 40 DKK isn't bad for a large white chocolate latte, a muffin and and fruit salad. As a matter of fact that'll only get you the coffee in DK! Anyways, it's expensive for India so my point is still valid.

Now as I sit and relax and get ready by colleague calls: Now the plan was to be as follows. My two colleagues from Chennai were to drive to the city of Cochin to collect me. We were then going to drive about 1 hour to the place of the meeting and and hereafter were were to drive to Coimbatore, which in on the way back to Chennai...All very simple. Now I get the call that one of the colleagues has gotten a pinched nerve or something in the neck and therefore colleague number two is flying into Cochin and out from there again in the evening. Now there seems to be a phenomenon in India and I am not the one who noticed it first. Something bad always happening to someone etc. Currently I have two colleagues with severely ill parents and one colleague with a sick brother and a child with a broken arm. One of the colleagues with the sick mother is also sick themselves with some kind of nausea/vomiting thing that keeps them up at night. Now I should let you know that we are only 5 people in the work place not including the care taker who is going to hospital tomorrow with his daughter so she can have a pin in her arm removed (she was driven down by a car). Bad things just seem to happen here! It's pretty weird. And I know that all the stories are true!

Anyways the story then takes a turn as I ask how I am to get to Coimbatore...Well I will just get a cab 160 km, no biggie. So I get on the plane (In India they understand that I NEED an exit seat) and just relax looking out the window. As we start to decent the landscape is entirely different to Hyderabad...Green green green. Palm trees everywhere. Apparently Cochin is one of the main locations for the growing of coconuts in India. I sit patiently until my colleague arrives 15 min after me and we hire a car. 150 km and 3 hours wait time, which pretty much equates to a whole day fare only comes to 200 DKK. We get going and drive through small villages with houses cut out of what almost looks like jungle. The first thing that strikes you in driving in Cochin is GOD! Ok to be more precise Kerala has a high percentage of Christians and there are churches and shrines every few kms. We move north and soon have to turn off to get to the site and we move along small roads lined with houses that are painted extremely vibrant colours. I haven't seen this anywhere else but the houses were Bright blue and orange, Purple, bright green and then you'd see a shrine with jesus on the cross. I really felt like it could have been South America. As we move further away from civilisation we come through rubber plantations and rolling hills with green everywhere. It's humid and warm but actually very nice.

The business visit was interesting and the people we met were friendly and kind. Afterwards my colleague and I return to the crossroad city and we find a taxi for me. He wants double fair as he is going somewhere where he can't get a return fair (fair enough). Now cabbie speaks NO English and my colleague can't really speak to him either, as he is from Chennai and this dude is from Cochin! However the cabbie knows where to go. Now this dude, like the other cabbie, has a cross hanging from the rearview mirror and a image of Jesus on the dash. Now through three hours or travelling without a word I was tempted to point at the picture and say "JE-SUS" but thought better of it as it may lead to me trying to explain Darwin's evolution of species through hand gestures.

Approaching Coimbatore we drove by a beautiful mountain range and it was generally a really lovely drive in a Indian built Mahindra Logan, which is actually based on the Romania Dacia Logan, which in turn is owned by French Renault. As we approach the airport area at dark it looks a little sleazy where I am and I tell the cabbie to pull over at the hotel I had seen a billboard for proclaiming something along the lines of "finest hotel in Coimbatore". No vacancy but the manager was kind enough to call another hotel and hold a room costing around 300 kr (that is a lot!). We drive and I don't know what to expect. It certainly can't be the place that looks a bit like a palace there...or wait...IT IS. Sigh of relief. It's call good. I come in and get checked in and go to my huge room with the relatively hard bed. However in India you can divide hotels into 2 categories: with toilet paper or without toilet paper. This was a toilet paper hotel. I spend the evening eating dinner and outside whilst watching cricket on a huge projection screen.

Next morning I flew back to Hyderabad with a plane that was meant for me (see photo).

Tomorrow morning I am off to Northern India starting with Delhi, so there will be more stories to tell I hope.

Thanks for stopping by

R